Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Miracle of Miracles- Wonder of Wonders

'Miraculous' Christ Washes Up in Texas Rio Grande


MONTERREY, Mexico (Reuters) - A fiberglass statue of Christ that washed up on a sandbar in the Rio Grande three weeks ago is attracting scores of devout pilgrims to a police department lost-and-found and being hailed as a miracle.

Police in Eagle Pass, Texas, said up to 40 people a day are coming to pay homage to the five-foot-tall figurine, known as "The Christ of the Undocumented," which was found by U.S. Border Patrol agents in the river.

"Some come to pray, and some come and just touch it," police lieutenant Daniel Morales said by telephone on Monday. "We have never experienced anything like this before, and interest is growing by the day."

Local Catholic Church authorities called the figure's arrival "miraculous" and said they wanted to place it in a specially dedicated chapel in the city.

"Jesus Christ manifests himself in many places, but he showed himself here in the way of an undocumented migrant," said Marta Ramirez, a spokeswoman for the city's Our Lady of Refuge Church.

In a related story, I was cleaning out my home and found an empty 2 liter Sam's Choice Root-Beer bottle from Wal-Mart.

It miraculously contained approximately three-dozen ants. These “Miracle Ants” as they are known in the area often congregate around sugary substances and are believed by locals to possess special, supernatural powers. They are able to lift objects many times their own weight and are rumored to be very hard working.

When asked for his opinion on the miraculous sighting, my landlord, known in the neighborhood as the Bird Man, was heard to say “Clean all that crap up before you leave- I aint’ your mother”.

The area around the Root-Beer bottle has become a gathering place for other local residents who are hoping to get a glimpse of the Miracle Ants.

Fellow tenant Michelle who lives next door asked, “When you leave can I have your garbage can? Mine has a broken handle”. It was unknown at press time if this “can” was to be used as a meeting place for other Miracle Ants, but local customs lead this reporter to believe that will be the case.

Other local residents were seen dividing up such artifacts as a broken ladder and a small Smokey Joe grill, presumably for purposes related to Miracle Ant Worship.